Good Flay

Disregarding the previous posts, Flop decided that he would finally end his addiction to flay pills. Not being able to stop it himself, he sought help from his local raisin supplier.

“O hai thar~!” said Flop smugly.  

“Oh not you again, didn’t we tell you that you weren’t welcome here?” replied the manager.

“Uh uh~!” Flop exclaimed.

He casually swept aside the manager, driving him into the wall and giving him severe head trauma.

Flop then headed to the lemon salesman strolling along the potato shack.

“12 lemons please,” murmured Flop. “Mmmmmm?”

Outraged, the lemon salesman swallowed Flop.

“Ah!” Flop squealed.

It was certain death for Flop, as he struggled in the raging waters. He grabbed onto a nearby tree, and pulled himself onto the pumpkin next to it. 

Flop had found himself in a sticky situation, as he traversed through the pumpkin farm, onward to the moon.

(Source: goodflay)

Sorry everyone, a medium sized whale attacked me a few months ago, so I was unable to update while I hid in the belly of the beast.

After a few weeks, I saw a frog in my dreams that granted me the knowledge of eternal wisdom. I was then able to craft a shield which deflected the whale’s body fluids that gave it horrible stomachaches, as it eventually wilted into a fine stew.

As I was leaving, an old man accused me of thievery, claiming the pot of fine stew was his. I spent a month in Rilmofo’s Super Fal Prison until a magical antelope helped me escape thanks to it’s fusion jet pack.

I hid in the great caves of Flay until it was safe enough to return home, where I sit now. I hope this was useful in explaining my peculiar absence.

(Source: goodflay)

Flop decided to move into his parent’s apartment once he was out of work options.

“Flop, my boy,” his father started.

But as Flop listened he was forced to flay him.

“Oh!” Flop’s father shouted.

Flop decided to seek psychological help to find out why he was always in need to flay things.

“Why hello there, I am Dr. Shrinhossolsnoffins of the Northern Flay Medical Community, or NFMC if you will. Now… I believe you have a problem, yes?” a short antelope spoke.

“Well,” Flop began.

“Oh no, I’m sorry we don’t treat that sort of thing.” Dr. Shrinhossolsnoffins responded.

So Flop decided to look elsewhere.

(Source: goodflay)

“DO NOT BELIEVE.” the Super Flay said.

So the eggplant thing watched the next episode; he laughed, but he didn’t cry, he gave it a thumbs down.

“No!” the producers screamed.

The show then gained abysmal ratings from then on out, so the director flayed himself and the show had to be cancelled.

Without a job, Flop started to work at his local Burger King.

“Lol I’m at Burger King bro.” he said to one of the customers.

Because of his poor customer service, he was fired and had to find a part time job as a janitor for the nearby Subway.

“Why are you only working at food places.” a flay asked.

Flop flayed him, and once again was fired for terrible customer service. 

(Source: goodflay)

Desperate for something that would get rid of the eggplant thing, Flop called upon a nearby loaf of super pumpkin bread.

“Flay you!” the bread spoke.

And so, the two created a hit Reality T.V. show, “Confessions of a Teenage Flay Burger 2.0 Revamp”, and it got over three million hits on the premiere episode.

Though as successful as they were, they had their flaws.

One day the eggplant thing stalked down the windy stairs and slouched on the purple eggplant colored couch. 

He lazily clicked the purple glowing button, and a Hi-Definition EggplantSony Television turned on.

The eggplant thing flipped through the channels, until he stumbled upon episode 4 of “Confessions of a Teenage Flay Burger 2.0 Revamp”, which looked interesting enough.

He laughed, he cried, he fed his eggplant juice bowl to a nearby ostrich, he gave it a thumbs up.

“NO!” a super flay screamed. “COME WITH ME!”

(Source: goodflay)